This blog covers our wait, travel, and adjustment to our 4 year old adopted Chinese daughter Sarah Shui Qing from Nanjing. There are over 1000 posts. I have moved my blog to Catching Butterflies 2. I hope you will enjoy reading this blog. It has alot of information on Special needs adoption. Follow us to our new address Catching Butterflies 2! Thank you for reading!

Sunday, December 31, 2006

Sorry :( I just read the blog of the traveling family I had hoped would get new pictures of Sarah. They were only allowed to visit the 1 year olds in Nanjing, so no new photos this time! That is just how it goes!!! My friend Hedda just left yesterday for China. She gets her beautiful daughter Maddie next week! She took a gift for Sarah, and I'm pretty sure I will get both pictures and a personal report from her. Maddie and Sarah have been in many pictures together. I think they might be good friends (maybe best friends). It is very special for me to be in contact with this family! Stay tune for more...It's midnight in China! Happy New Year!!!
I just saw this concert today on TV. Here is James Taylor singing "You've got a friend". A great song to start the new year! Soon(God willing) our Sarah will have a family of friends...and we will be there winter ,spring ,summer and fall...always!

Saturday, December 30, 2006

panda cupcakes

when it's your favorite panda's birthday or you want to make any occasion more festive, the obvious choice is to make panda cupcakes! Here is how they are made! How cute!!! I look forward to Sarah's first birthday party!

Happy New Years!!!
Hi, I just read that the Chinese Internet connections have been down for the past 3 days because of an earth quake off the coast of Taiwan. This is why we don't have new photos of Sarah! I just read the blog of one of the traveling families. They are doing great, but have allot of trouble sending mail over the Internet! I am so glad to hear they are doing good. When people are super stressed, they usually don't write on their kind of makes you nervous that things are not working out. In this case it was an earth quake blocking communications. We sure have gotten spoiled by technology!

The discovery of fireworks or namely the formulation of gunpowder is believed to have occurred by chance approximately 2,000 years ago in China.
It is thought that a Chinese cook accidentally mixed three common kitchen ingredients:
These were heated over a fire and dried to give a black flaky powder which burned with a loud bang when ignited. This crude, early mixture has come to be known in our modern world today as gun powder.
The Chinese named this fascinating black powder "huo yao" ("Fire Chemical") and developed it further. The mixture was inserted into the hollow of a bamboo stick and when thrown into a fire, the gases produced by the ignited burning powder inside caused an immense build up of pressure and blasted the tube apart. The basic fire cracker was born.
Thereafter, fire crackers played an essential part to Chinese festivities -weddings, religious rituals -any cause for celebration heard their bang due to the belief that they were thought to be powerful enough to scare off evil spirits.
It was inevitable that the time would come when people would begin to realize that these now powerful explosives could be applied to warfare. The Chinese were well aware of the killing power these explosives had and within 100 years had not only developed fire arrows (bamboo fire crackers attached to regular arrows and shot at the enemy) but even 'Ground Rats'. These consisted of propelling rats from inside the bamboo fire crackers and toward the enemy, creating a great psychological effect -scaring soldiers and causing horses to go wild.

Sorry, but I still did not get new pictures of Sarah. The traveling families must have their hands full with their new kids...maybe they will find the time to post the orphanage pictures later? I think Sarah is a bit of a fire cracker by personality! I bet she will light up our New Year!!!

Friday, December 29, 2006

HERE is a very interesting post called " The Myth of the Mourning Birth mother". Maybe birth parents in China don't feel the loss of their child the same way we would. Maybe they simply do what they feel they must do, and move on with their lives, forgetting the child they lost! Even the grief and loss we feel in the West is a luxury many people in this world can not afford! We can never know for sure how they feel...each birth parent is different. This is however a very interesting article.

It is late in China, and we did not get new pictures today. Maybe tomorrow? Here are some of Sarah's pictures so far. I hope to add to this collection soon!

Hi, I am still expecting new pictures of Sarah soon. Please keep checking back. Maybe today! Anyway, I read about this one women who is making quilts to raise money for their 2ND Chinese adoption. There is a tradition in the northern part of China to make a Bai Jia Bei, or 100 Good Wishes Quilt. When a child is born, friends and family are invited to contribute a scrap of old clothing along with a special wish which is to be made into a quilt by the child's mother. It is said that the luck and energy of the people who wore these clothes surrounds the child when she is wrapped in the quilt. The quilt contains the luck, energy, and good wishes from all the families and friends who contributed a piece of fabric. The quilt is then passed down from generation to generation. My mom has already made a quilt for Sarah. I have not seen the quilt yet (Mom is in the USA, and I am in Germany). It is my surprise! If you don't sew (and I don't sew), and don't have a Mom that sews, maybe you might want to look at buying a quilt and at the same time helping to support this adoption! The web site is HERE.I guess a quilt made by someone else won't have the same kind of "luck energy" as a self made quilt, but it will bless the family selling the quilts, and help bring a child home from China (that has to be worth something)!

Thursday, December 28, 2006

China to stay with one-child rule

BEIJING, China (AP) -- China has no plans to change its one-child policy, Premier Wen Jiabao said, adding family planning was critical to China's modernization plans.

The official Xinhua News Agency on Wednesday quoted Wen as saying the "government will adhere to the basic policy of family planning with improved services and stronger leadership."

He added that family planning was crucial to China's modernization and the building of a "harmonious society," a catchphrase meant to mean a more equal distribution of riches in a country with a growing wealth gap.

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Hi, I hope you all had a nice Christmas! We are still enjoying our vacation. Juergen gets two weeks of vacation. We did nothing but eat, sleep, and play for the past few days. Now our minds are turning towards "the list" of stuff we want to take care of around the house. Juergen is putting a net under the open stairway in our 3 story house. We hope Sarah will be smart enough not to try to slip through the stairs, but we don't want to take any chances. Our oldest daughter Jessica almost fell through the stair railing when she was smaller. This was in another house, and we put a net up for her too. Sarah is just a little thing...and we just don't know how careful she will be! 3 floors is a long way to fall! Anyway, it will keep her from dropping her toys down the stairs. I may get new pictures of Sarah tomorrow! I thought I did not care about new pictures (you know, all I want is the real thing). Actually, I am excited about new pictures! Our papers went to China two months ago, so we also hope to get our TA (travel approval)in the next two to four weeks! My heart is full of joy and expectation!

Monday, December 25, 2006

Merry Christmas! I read this awesome quote on one of my Yahoo groups. It is about trust...
When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw
away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer.

- Corrie Ten Boom - author and Holocaust survivor

Saturday, December 23, 2006

A Christmas Story - Chinese Dinner

Friday, December 22, 2006

If I had it my way, I would be stuck in the fog at London Heathrow airport! I looked back at some of my old posts. I had hoped to travel now to China, by British Air from London to Shanghai. Flights are being canceled right and left. If I had it my way, I would be stuck in London with my autistic daughter Jessica. I do not know how things will work out, but today I can thank God I am not stuck in London! I pray all of you who are traveling someplace for Christmas have a very safe trip! We are warm and safe at home...recovering from the flu. Everything is ready for Christmas. I need to buy food because all the stores close for 3 days(imagine stores closing in the USA for 3 whole days). Juergen still has to buy me a gift...but that is pretty much his annual tradition, shopping 3 hours before the stores close! This year he agreed to adopt Sarah, and he is taking me to China, so I don't expect any great gifts...he is way off the hook!!!

Thursday, December 21, 2006

2006 has almost gone. It's been a great year! I will write a short year in review letter on our family blog if you care to take a look. Today I just wanted to take the time to thank you all for being here with me, and supporting us with your comments, and prayers. 2007 should be very exciting as we finally are able to go to China and pick up Sarah. I have been so blessed to meet some really great people in this process. There are the most amazing people "called" to love and care for fatherless children. I believe most of us have discovered a secret...we win when we adopt. The kids gain so much from us, but somehow we gain more! Part of what I have gained is the acquaintance of amazing people like you! I wish you a warm and blessed Christmas...and all that is good in 2007!

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

I just found this picture of Sarah in her group in Nanjing. I think it must be about 9 months to one year old. She has not changed much. I should get new pictures some time next week, and the week after that. There are 3 families from the Nanjing Yahoo group traveling to pick up their beautiful kids! Two families actually receive their children on Christmas day! Now that is a gift!!! I know our TA is only 2-4 weeks away. I am excited that our day will come too! I actually have the flu. I got it from my daughters. I feel awful! My wonderful husband took the day off to take care of everyone. I am one blessed wife! I love my kids very much, but my love for Juergen is in a way other dimension! Apart from my love for Jesus, Juergen is the greatest gift God has or ever could give me! OK, I am going to stop...I am probably making you sick!

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Shui Qing is Sarah's Chinese name. It means clean or pure water. She was found on a stone bench at a water purifying plant in Nanjing ,China on the day she was born. In a way I am surprised at how people respond when they hear she was abandoned. I guess it just seems so normal to me...I am so caught up in this world of orphan awareness, I forget other people just don't know how common it is for a child to be abandoned. There are around 100,000 children (mostly girls) abandoned in China every year. But it is not just China, it's India, Ethiopia, Russia, Brazil, and..and.. Thousands upon thousands of children left by generally well meaning parents who for unknown reasons felt they had no other choice. Philip and Thomas (our two sons adopted from Thailand) were also abandoned probably for medical reasons. Both boys had correctable but life threatening medical needs. Many people in Thailand have no health insurance, and would be charged for their children's treatment if they could get treatment. We believe the birth parents did what they could to save the boys lives. And Sarah's birth parents probably felt they had no choice but to leave her where she could be found, and pray she has a better future. I am so grateful to God I have a choice to pick them up...I only wish other people would also choose to do the same! Abandoned children do not choose to spend their lives with out a family...but we must choose if we would be a family to one of these!

Sunday, December 17, 2006

per·spec·tive: The ability to perceive things in their actual interrelations or comparative importance: tried to keep my perspective throughout the crisis.

I read a post on one of my yahoo groups recently that seemed a bit over dramatic. The writer was a waiting mom who is understandably disappointed she will not be adopting her new child before Christmas. I am sure there are allot of us equally disappointed we won't be spending Christmas with our new children. It would have made the day very special! I am going to try very hard to make it special anyway! I keep reminding myself to keep my perspective! Sarah does not know what Christmas is, I am sure she won't be missing it! I am the big loser here! And my loss will be soon replaced with joy, our travel approval can not be too far away! I've heard some real sad and genuinely tragic news lately. Several people I know are going through some very real trouble! Sure I would have loved to have Sarah home for Christmas, but this seems like a small thing to me now...I don't want to bring you down with the tragic stories of others I've heard about this week! All I can say is it's given me a new perspective! If I start wining or complaining...please someone kick me!

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Chinese New Year is the biggest holiday in China. This coming New Year begins February 18Th and goes for 15 days. It is at the same time as our kids Spring vacation (Carnival). This would be the next best time for us to travel to China, but government offices are closed in China. You can not process an adoption during this period. I really don't know how it''s going to work out. The kids are just going to need to miss some school! HERE is a good site for information on Chinese New Year. I am sure it would be very exciting to be in China during the New Year! Everything is decorated in red, lanterns everywhere, fireworks and dragon dances, special food, and happy people! I would not mind seeing China at New is just the HOW IS THIS GOING TO WORK question! I guess we will find out, and I hope soon!

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

This is a beautiful story of love and sacrifice...

operation smile

Monday, December 11, 2006

Maddies mom said she would carry a gift to Sarah for me. I was thinking of sending Sarah a Bell princess dress. What do you think?
Well the TA's are starting to come in. Not for me (yet) but for one of Sarah's best buddies at the children's home in Nanjing! A major congratulations to Maddie and her very happy family who will be traveling to pick her up in a few short weeks! If it can not be us, I am sure glad it's them!!!

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Here is Sarah singing Jingle Bells in Chinese! You have to see's too cute! It is actually my daughter Nicole singing. She is studying Chinese every Saturday.
Hi, I just received an end of the year news letter from AAI (Adoption Advocates International). We used this wonderful agency to adopt Philip & Thomas. AAI has programs with China, and Thailand, but their strongest program is with Ethiopia. They place healthy children and babies, and also older sibling groups with families in the USA. They began placing HIV+ children,and I would like to quote their newsletter...

One of our special joys this year has been the increase in the placement of HIV+children. Just a couple of years ago no HIV+ children were being placed for adoption. With the medication now being provided to the children their condition is manageable and 4 children have joined their families this year and 10 more families are in the adoption process. We are especially pleased when adoptive parents are accepting of sibling groups for HIV+ children. One older boy was at Layla (this is AAI's home for healthy children) for over two years and beginning to fear he would never be adopted. He had a younger sister at AHOPE (AAI's home for HIV+ children).It was decided the two children should be placed together. When a family said they wanted to adopt two children who really needed a family we suggested these two and they are now together with their new family in Oregon.

Wow, it makes me want to cry! I wrote earlier I am reading the book There is no me without you. I can tell you honestly, it will be very hard for me not to at least try to convince Juergen to adopt from Ethiopia. First things first (that meaning Sarah). Maybe you should consider adopting from Ethiopia, or at least give to AAI's many good prodjects that help the children in Ethiopia. I also challange you to read the book There is no me without you. It will move you heart, it is an amazing book!

Friday, December 08, 2006

Some families from my agency who have been waiting a very long time received their TA's (travel approval) today. I didn't! I knew there was no realistic way it would happen, but I pray and I really hope! I guess that also leaves me open to some pretty strong disappointment! I think everyone loves the person who has faith and "wins", but what about those who have faith and do not see the evidence of their desire manifested? I think I need to go back and read Hebrews 11. It begins with these famous words... Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. This is what the ancients were commended for. and ends with these less known words... These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.
Something to think about. I guess the bottom line is not that I receive what I am hopping for (in my case a TA before the end of the year), but that I place my trust in God, and receive more of Him. Sarah would be an amazing Christmas gift...but Christmas is about Jesus. I already have Christ!

Thursday, December 07, 2006

HERE is a photo show from Love without boundaries.It stars some of the beautiful Chinese children they were able to help in 2006. They have medical teams that do all sorts of surgery to help these kids. This saves their lives, gives them a better future, and in many cases makes the children more adoptable. If you have noticed on the side bar, you can buy books & other things through If you click on Amazon from my website, 10% of what you spend will go to LWB to help the kids in China. You can also consider giving to them. You could help sponsor a surgery, help with nanny care in the children's homes, or help with their feeding programs!watch the photo show, and please consider helping this great work!

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

I saw this picture on CNN today.It was taken of aids orphans in Makeevka, eastern Ukraine. I was thinking about the orphan population in the world today. It use to be different. Children would lose their parents, and some would need to go to orphanages.Most orphans would find a home at grandmas house, or aunt or uncle so and so's House.The community could usually manage their own orphans. We would not need to consider adoption,unless we wanted children and could not have a child biologically. Aids has changed everything.The numbers are overwhelming. Communities no longer have the people to take the children in. Aunt and uncle so and so have also died of Aids.Where do you place an extra 2 or more million children a year? When will the people in the West wake up and stop acting like it is as it always has been! Aids has changed realty...we must be open to doing more for these children who are growing up with out even the basic needs of food, cloths, safety, and education! Your parents and mine did not live with the scale of need we are living with! We can try to keep up with the Status quo or we can rise to the challenge and do something!

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Monday, December 04, 2006

Are some of you praying for us? I am feeling allot less stressed, and much more certain that it's going to work out perfectly! I don't know when we will travel to China,in two weeks or maybe two months? What I know is God has heard my concerns, He knows my heart, and it all rests safely in His hands. He will not forget me! In fact I am sure He has the details worked out beautifully! So today, even if my circumstances have not changed, I have changed! I've known this from the beginning with my mind, but now I am starting to believe it emotionally. I'm not as quick as some! Thank you for praying...and don't stop!

Sunday, December 03, 2006

A Bible verse that stands out to me today...

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
2Corinthians 4:16-18

I've been so fixated on going to China before the end of the year. I've wanted to have Sarah before Christmas (my own hearts desire). I've checked the airline prices. Even if we got a TA, I'm not sure we could afford the tickets anymore. So many people love to travel at Christmas time. I do lose heart! It is easy to say "Amy, just trust God". It is much harder for me personally to get to this place where I can really let go, and not even look at the outward circumstances, really just putting these concerns I have in the hands of God. If I was traveling alone, it would,I believe be easier. But I want to travel with my whole family, so we have a long list of needs (including cheap tickets, hopefully a direct flight, and a airplain that has individual video screens playing Disney movies like "CARS"). Some of you are saying to yourselves, those are not needs,those are desires. Maybe the movie "CARS" is just a desire, but I do desire it because its Thomas's favorite movie, and I want the flight to be OK for all my kids. Traveling with Jessica(she is 15 years old and has autism) is hard enough. It is a Hugh blessing if the other 3 kids are well cared for so Juergen and I can care for Jessica. I am trying to get to this place of real trust. I can not say I am really there, but I am closer. Thomas had a real melt down the other day. I wanted to get the boys a Lego advent calendar.We went to toys are us to buy it. They were out of the calendar.While we were there, Thomas saw the Lego he wants for Christmas. He really fell apart when we left the store with out buying his Christmas present. Afterwards I had to talk to him about trusting us (remember this is only his 2ND Christmas, and it is overwhelmingly exciting). He wants it so badly, and he was afraid if He didn't get it now, it was not certain it would happen. I realize I am no different then Thomas. I want Sarah so badly, and God is telling me to trust him.

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Shi shang zhi you ma ma hao
you ma de hai zi xiang ge bao.
tou jin ma ma de huai bao
xin fu xiang bu liao.
Mommy's the only dearest in the world
With a mom, you have the most valued treasure.
Jump into mom's heart
and you have endless happiness.
shi shang zhi you ma ma hao
mei ma de hai zi xiang ge cao
li kai ma ma de huai bao
xin fu na li zhao. 世上只有妈妈好
Mommy's the only dearest in the world
without a mom you are like a piece of grass/straw
away from mom's heart,
where will you find happiness?

listen to this song at

Friday, December 01, 2006

I did not win the bid on the doll bed! They wanted allot for the shipping, and I wasn't willing to pay more for her doll bed then I payed for her bed. I've got 7 tickets to China to pay for. I'm sure I'll find something else for her dolls!
I want everyone to pray for me. I am putting up the Christmas stuff with the kids. I packed the advent calendars, and put up the lights. I couldn't tell you how deeply sad I am right now! I want to make this a special time for my other children, but my heart is so NOT HERE! I can imagine how difficult it is for families who have loved ones away in war, or even my own parents who I know miss me allot! I have a great deal to be thankful for, and I realize Sarah does not miss Christmas. She has never had Christmas, so how could she miss it? It is all me! I feel almost cheated! We would have our TA by now, if, if ,if... I know it will come in due time, but right now I don't feel so Merry! I need some courage, and maybe some encouragement!

All I really want for Christmas is a family

I'm just playing with a new piece of software I got to make scrapbook pages. You know what? The pictures are not making me happy anymore! I have got to get to China soon! I don't want a picture...I want my baby!!!

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

I got 7 new pictures of Sarah today. This must be some kind of record! She is looking very boyish in her heavy black jacket, and short hair. At least it looks like they are letting the hair grow out! I have loads of dresses, and lots of pink stuff for our little more boy stuff (unless she wants it)!
One of her eyes always looks weaker then the other. We are going to need to check that out. What do you think?
The new song is called History makers. Juergen and I went to a Delirious concert just a few weeks ago. I guess it is a song to generate a little faith in me, that God can do great things when we are living for him! Sorry for getting preachy, but I am needing so badly to trust in my God to hold me up right now. You may lean on something else, but God is basically everything to me! With out his help and hope, I would not be able to stand. Here are the words to the song...
History Maker

Is it true today that when people pray
Cloudless skies will break
Kings and queens will shake
Yes it's true and I believe it
I'm living for you

Is it true today that when people pray
We'll see dead men rise
And the blind set free
Yes it's true and I believe it
I'm living for you

I'm gonna be a history maker in this land
I'm gonna be a speaker of truth to all mankind
I'm gonna stand, I'm gonna run
Into your arms, into your arms again
Into your arms, into your arms again

Well it's true today that when people stand
With the fire of God, and the truth in hand
We'll see miracles, we'll see angels sing
We'll see broken hearts making history
Yes it's true and I believe it
We're living for you

Written by Martin Smith ©1996 Curious? Music UK
Oh, my 15 year old autistic daughter just wrote a letter at school saying she wants her sister, but she doesn't want to fly to China! She is too afraid to fly right now! Well, that is super! I don't have anyone who could watch Jessica for a week, and Juergen and I both need to travel because Germany will not let us readopt Sarah here! Everything must be final in China, so somehow Jessica must go! Just one more detail for God...I can not figure it out!

Dreaming out loud
I contacted my adoption agency (IAAP) yesterday. I wanted to find out if we have a LID, that's log in date. The answer is no. I asked if that meant we are not logged in, or they just don't know the date yet. They said, they often get the date a month or two later, and sometimes never. Families use the LID to guess how much time they need to wait for a TA (travel approval). I was pretty depressed about the lack of clear dates! This is for most waiting families the hardest thing! You know your whole world is about to be turned upside down, you know your going to need airplane tickets, visas, hotels etc...but you can not plan anything. We could go in two weeks or four months! I HATE this uncertainty! I do know we want to travel together as a family (all 6+1 of us). We are pretty sure what hotels we would like to stay in. We want to fly to Shanghai on British airways (with a stop in London). We want to take the train to Nanjing, and stay at the Mandarin hotel. We want to see if we can travel over night on the train to Guangzhou. In Guangzhou we would like to stay at the Oakwood ( a full service apartment). From Guangzhou, we hope to take the train to Hong Kong, and fly home from there. If anyone has taken an overnight train from Nanjing to Guangzhou , please tell me about it! I am still praying we can travel over Christmas...but I realize that is not likely to happen. Still, if God wants it to happen, we will go in the next month! I hope everything works out OK. These are only the things we are hoping to do, you can not really plan anything without dates! Right now we can afford to take the whole family , but this could also change as prices go up and down! I would love to scream! I guess this is when I need to really trust God to deal with the details! He knows what we need...every last detail of what we need!

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

These are coke Christmas ads. The 2ND ad is of Germany.
27 DAYS until Christmas!
just thought you might want to know!

I saw this story on the News.I'm going shopping for old porcelain in China!

HONG KONG, China (Reuters) -- An 18th century Chinese famille rose "swallows" bowl has broken the world record for a Qing Dynasty porcelain piece, selling for HK$151.3 million (US$19.5 million) at a Christie's auction in Hong Kong on Tuesday.

The pre-auction estimate for the piece from the Qianlong period had been HK$60 million to HK$80 million.

The finely potted white bowl, exquisitely decorated with a blossoming apricot, willow and a pair of spring swallows is considered to be one of the great masterpieces of porcelain from the Qianlong period.

The piece, which once belonged to the Woolworth heiress Barbara Hutton, bears the reign mark of the Qianlong emperor (1736-1795) on its base.

Monday, November 27, 2006

My online friend Mary had this on her website. I thought it was cute, so I added it here! If you click on more you can feed Emperor Ming!

adopt your own virtual pet!

Friday, November 24, 2006

The day after Thanksgiving is suppose to be the biggest shopping day of the year.I decided to do some shopping of my own. I like to shop on e-bay. I placed a bid on this great set of old doll furniture in Northern Germany. It sells in 5 days. I'll tell you if I win the bid!
The Translation of the song "Come Un Fiume Tu /together with you" by Andrea Bocelli
Slowly you come to me
Right into my heart
Tell me my love, what do you see there?

The snow has all but melted
My love, I think you know
It's been such a long way
to reach you
A steep, but worthwhile climb
But it makes me feel alive
Only you can set my soul free

A soul which is lost after you
And lost when you're not here
To reach just a part of you
gives momentum to my song
And this for me is life
A life, together, with you
A life without the "if"
A life, slowly learning to fly again,
together with you

The snow has all but melted
My love, and it's thanks to you
And as it melts, like you,
it flows into me
Flows, just like a river
And just like a river
you effortlessly carry my soul

A soul which has opened up for you
Without the "if"
It will light up the colours
in your eyes
There will never be snow again
it will climb and climb until
It will open up with you.

I got a real blessing today.My sister and friend Mary visited Sarah in the children's home today. Thank you is not good enough! Mary, I am really grateful for the pictures and even more the report! Here is what she wrote...

Amy, Okay we just got back from the orphanage. You are going to absolutely kill me! lol I totally forgot to ask about sizes, and I didn't even look at her feet. Please don't get mad. I can't even explain what a scene it was there!!! However, if I were to guess I would bring some 2T and some 3T clothing for her. She's probably a 3T height, but her weight....she's very thin. (Not scarily thin, so don't worry too much about that!)

Coco said that she is a very very clever child. She can outsmart the nannies any day of the week! When we got there, they were just moving the children from lessons to snack and they opened the door and she took off!!!! I mean, Sarah bolted out of that room into the hallway and we all had to chase her down! She is absolutely adorable!!!

When we caught her in the hallway, Coco tried to pick her up, but Sarah just relaxed...jelly-like so no one could pick her up. Coco told her, "Your mama's friend is here to take your picture!" Sarah said something and everyone started laughing hard! Our guide said, "Sarah says she doesn't want mama's friend, she wants mama."

Now that I know you're probably crying, I'll send the pictures. It will probably take 2 or 3 e-mails.


"Sarah says she doesn't want mama's friend, she wants mama."

I'm going to live on those words for a month!

Thursday, November 23, 2006

I got a surprise new pictures of Sarah today! Another waiting mom got update pictures of her beautiful daughter, and spotted Sarah in two of the shots,so she was kind enough to forward the pictures to me! I actually expect new pictures tomorrow because the Morris family said they are visiting the SWI and taking pictures of Sarah just for me! Oh thank you so much Mary! Please give her a hug (or two or three) from me! I am hoping it won't be long before I can give her my own hugs! Happy Thanksgiving everyone! God bless you and keep you close to his heart! God grant you his favour and fill you with his loving kindness and his peace!

If your interested in adopting one of the 8 kids at All Gods Children and recieve one of their grants, you must act right away! The deadline for the grant is on

Tuesday November 28, 2006. 12:00 pm (pst)

The following information will be required...

1. Completed Moriah Grant Application
2. A statement from each parent stating the reasons why you believe this child is right for your family, if you have initiated the home study process, and a financial statement indicating your ability to spend up to $10,000 of your own funds on this adoption process.(If you live in the USA, there is a tax credit that will refund all the expenses you must pay. These expenses will include your home study, visa, and travel costs).
3. A written statement of your personal faith experience (from both prospective parents). This should be no more than one typed page (single women can also apply).
4. A statement indicating who reviewed your medicals and what understanding you have of the special needs of the child you are considering for your family.
5. A family photo

Please consider adopting one of these beautiful kids. A grant like this does not come along very not!!! Again, the contact is HERE!

The girl pictured above is 5 years old and I would adopt her myself, but they would not let me adopt two kids at one time. Don't be afraid of their special needs!The 2 year old boy with Myelomeningocele is post surgery and 100% normal & healthy! Do not think you can do this later either...if you want one of these adoption grants then you must move NOW!!! If you need help with the application,let me know by leaving a comment or signing my guest book. I wish someone would give me $12,000 for adoption! What a blessing!

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Hi everyone, I just read this letter on one of my yahoo adoption groups, and I'm sure the writer wouldn't mind me passing on this amazing offer! If you want to adopt a special needs child from China (and most of their needs are mild and correctable) then rush on this offer! It is basically a free adoption! God bless the person who gave the money, and God bless the families who get to parent one of these sweethearts!

I have to share this wonderful news on All God's Children Int'l's
website. There are 8 beautiful children remaining on their WC
listing. A generous donor has offered to pay ALL foreign fees and
agency fees to place these children.... $12,430 per child!!!!! With
the tax credit that would mean there would be no cost to adopt one of
these precious children. They are all beautiful... go look at them at
HERE You don't need a password. Oh, how I wish
China would allow for two adoptions at once. These children are
precious! Please go see if your child is on this list, especially if
finances were a barrier for you.

There is a 4 year old girl with a heart condition that is so beautiful! I have two kids with heart problems. I would love to talk to you about this special need. Generally it is really easy to manage! You have to take a look, It usually cost between $15-20 thousand to adopt from China! What an amazing offer! What beautiful kids!

The photo is of one of the waiting boys.He already had surgery.
A Thanksgiving Story

Help carry one another’s burdens and in this way you will obey the law of Christ.
Gal. 6:2

It was the day before Thanksgiving -- the first one my three children and I would be spending without their father, who had left several months before. Now the two older children were very sick with the flu, and the eldest had just been prescribed bed rest for a week.

It was a cool, gray day outside, and a light rain was falling. I grew wearier as I scurried around, trying to care for each child: thermometers, juice, diapers. And I was fast running out of liquids for the children. But when I checked my purse, all I found was about $2.50 -- and this was supposed to last me until the end of the month. That’s when I heard the phone ring.

It was the secretary from our former church, and she told me that they had been thinking about us and had something to give us from the congregation. I told her that I was going out to pick up some more juice and soup for the children, and I would drop by the church on my way to the market.

I arrived at the church just before lunch. The church secretary met me at the door and handed me a special gift envelope. “We think of you and the kids often,” she said, “and you are in our hearts and prayers. We love you.” When I opened the envelope, I found two grocery certificates inside. Each was worth $20. I was so touched and moved, I broke down and cried.

“Thank you very much,” I said, as we hugged each other. “Please give our love and thanks to the church.” Then I drove to a store near our home and purchased some much-needed items for the children.

At the check-out counter I had a little over $14.00 worth of groceries, and I handed the cashier one of the gift certificates. She took it, then turned her back for what seemed like a very long time. I thought something might be wrong. Finally I said, “This gift certificate is a real blessing. Our former church gave it to my family, knowing I’m a single parent trying to make ends meet.“

The cashier then turned around, with tears in her loving eyes, and replied, “Honey, that’s wonderful! Do you have a turkey?”

“No. It’s okay because my children are sick anyway.”

She then asked, “Do you have anything else for Thanksgiving dinner?”

Again I replied, “No.”

After handing me the change from the certificate, she looked at my face and said, “Honey, I can’t tell you exactly why right now, but I want you to go back into the store and buy a turkey, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie or anything else you need for a Thanksgiving dinner.”

I was shocked, and humbled to tears. “Are you sure?” I asked.

“Yes! Get whatever you want. And get some Gatorade for the kids.”

I felt awkward as I went back to do some more shopping, but I selected a fresh turkey, a few yams and potatoes, and some juices for the children. Then I wheeled the shopping cart up to the same cashier as before. As I placed my groceries on the counter, she looked at me once more with giant tears in her kind eyes and began to speak.

“Now I can tell you. This morning I prayed that I could help someone today, and you walked through my line.” She reached under the counter for her purse and took out a $20 bill. She paid for my groceries and then handed me the change. Once more I was moved to tears.

The sweet cashier then said, “I am a Christian. Here is my phone number if you ever need anything.” She then took my head in her hands, kissed my cheek and said, “God bless you, honey.”

As I walked to my car, I was overwhelmed by this stranger’s love and by the realization that God loves my family too, and shows us his love through this stranger’s and my church’s kind deeds.

The children were supposed to have spent Thanksgiving with their father that year, but because of the flu they were home with me, for a very special Thanksgiving Day. They were feeling better, and we all ate the goodness of the Lord’s bounty -- and our community’s love. Our hearts were truly filled with thanks.

By Andréa Nannette
from Chicken Soup for the Christian Soul

This amazing photo was taken by a little girl named Lydia. She is 6 years old. Lydia is the brand new daughter of the Morris family. They just picked her up in Nanjing ,China this week. Notice the tears of joy in Lydia's mothers eyes. What a treasure! I am printing this photo with permission from the family. Maybe it is because it was taken by a little girl who has waited for 6 years to have a mommy,but I think it is one of the most beautiful photos I've ever seen! If you click on the photo, you can see it much larger!

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Hi, I just read that one of the TA's (travel approvals) from our agency was given to a family who had a LID (log in date) of October 1. Our documents were sent to China October 27th. We don't have a clear LID, but if we are logged in then maybe we could be in the next batch of TA'S! I am just dreaming out loud here! I don't even know if we are logged in yet. Tell me, where do you draw the line between crazy mother and great women of faith? PRAY! PRAY! PRAY!!!
If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
--- Lao-Tzu

Monday, November 20, 2006

I will not be able to sleep for the next month! I am so excited at even the chance of going to China before the end of 2006! I just checked the weather in Nanjing and
Guangzhou in the month of December.In Nanjing it is 4C, and 40F. Guangzhou is a warm 15C and 59F. I am dreaming of a warm Christmas!!!

Some one on my Nanjing Yahoo group just got their TA (Travel approval) in a lightning 27 days! Imagine! So many people this year have had to wait 100 plus days for a TA! I am praying for the impossible! We would love to bring Sarah home before the end of the year! It makes me so excited to hear that the miracle happened at least once! Oh God, me too! ME TOO!!!

Click on the comic strip to make it larger.

We don't really have Thanksgiving here in Germany.I would have to say it is the oddest day of the year here. People go to work, nothing shuts down,same as any other day! I remember the best turkey I ever cooked in the USA. We lived in California, and invited international students from the University home to share the dinner with us. I got a large turkey, and after washing it, I placed it in a new trash bag. Then I took a whole bottle of brandy and poured that into the bag. I let it marinate for 3 days in the refrigerator. Finally, I baked the turkey in a Reynolds baking bag. The turkey fell off the bones, and had the very best flavor! I highly recommend this to anyone who wants to bake a turkey for Thanksgiving! It is so easy, and so good!!!

Sunday, November 19, 2006

A family in one of my Yahoo groups posted this video from a waiting family. It uses the Merry Christmas song by 3rd Day.

I found these toys for Sarah's doll yesterday in the grocery store. The director of her orphanage wrote us a short note (this was in the summer)to tell us they got the care package we had sent.In that note they said she really likes dolls. I thought she would enjoy these toys for her doll! It really does make me happy to imagine her here playing with her baby doll!

Saturday, November 18, 2006

The new China

Friday, November 17, 2006

We did not get any new photos of Sarah today (sad). We did get this picture of her Orphanage. I also found out that the organization "Half the Sky" has been there for the last month. They have really well trained nannies that do great stuff with the kids. So Amity has hugging grannies there and half the sky also has nannies. She will probably have unrealistic expectations of me when she comes (with all those nannies helping her day and night). It is great she is in such a wonderful environment! I've read it is probably the best orphanage in China! I am glad for the kids in Nanjing, but since they already had Amity, maybe half the sky should have gone to an orphanage were they don't get any extra input? There is no good reason to spoil one orphan population while so many other kids are starved for additional affection!

I may or may not get photos today. The families traveling say they took lots of pictures, but only of the babies ages 1-3. Sarah is almost 4 so I don't know if she was included in the group. They also say they are having problems loading the pictures. The Internet connection is slow.I guess it takes them 3 minutes to load even one picture. Because of this, they may not send the pictures until they return to the USA in about a week. What a let down!!! I may still get pictures today, but it doesn't sound to positive! I could not load pictures from my hotel room in Thailand either. I had a memory stick that I brought to a fast Internet cafe. That way it only took me 5 minutes to post my blog. Don't you just love technology, and really hate it too!!!
My grow up mind says they did their best, and I should just say thank you for thinking of us. I know they tried! They did try! I am really disappointed! I was so sure,with two families visiting the orphanage today, I would get many new pictures of Sarah! Now I don't even get to celebrate new pictures for the other families. None of us got pictures! I am really SAD!!! I think I will take a hot bath, and eat some chocolate! It is my fault for getting my hopes up too high! They took pictures, but again we must wait to see them! Hope deferred maketh the heart sick but when the desire cometh it is a tree of life. Proverbs 13:12
It is 1:30 in Germany and I managed to get some shopping done. I bought donuts and let the kids eat them so I won't need to make lunch for another hour. I have camped at the computer,and still no photos of Sarah. I need to remember this! When I go to China I need to take the time to take good pictures for waiting families, and post the pictures right away! I am sure I am not the only person camping out in front of the computer. I can just feel our collective hope for new pictures. I can also feel our collective disappointment if they don't get posted soon!
As I write this it is 4:30pm in China, and 9:30am in Germany. I've been on the computer checking for photos for one hour. I check the Yahoo group site, my own personal e-mail, and the web sites of the two families I know are suppose to visit the orphanage. I should just turn the computer off and go buy some food! We are out of milk and coffee and just about everything else. I guess I just wanted everyone to know I am not so cool about all this. I am so anxious to catch a new glimpse of Sarah. I will probably cry if I don't get a new picture! It is never easy to wait for what you love!

Thursday, November 16, 2006

A family from my Nanjing Yahoo group is picking up their super cute son this week. In fact they have had him for a few days now. Tomorrow they are scheduled to visit the orphanage, and take pictures. Maybe we will get some new pictures tomorrow! It's like waiting for a birthday, or Christmas!!! Another family from the same Yahoo group visits the orphanage next week (God willing). What a gift to have contact with these families. What a great tool the Internet can be (and yes I also know it can be a tool for evil). Hopefully you will have a good reason to check my blog tomorrow!

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Hi, my poem for the new Love with out Boundaries book, Loves Journey 2 has been accepted. The book should be out in time for Mothers day 2007. It will help raise money for the great projects at LWB. I actually wrote this poem when I was praying for another child named Lian Yun Peng. He is a very cute 7 year old boy who Thank God is being adopted!

My waiting child

I was not there the first time you laughed.
I missed the first bottle, I missed the first bath.
I did not witness your first steps.
You’re growing so big without me.
I hope I will be there to teach you to trust.
You'll learn to speak my mother tongue.
You won't be adopted when you're young,
but you'll know the love of a family.
God has not forgotten every tear
you have cried alone, my waiting child.
And I have not forgotten that you are there.
My days would be empty without you.
By Amy Heymannr>

Friday, November 10, 2006

I am following the stories of 5 families who are right now in China, or going there next week to adopt. I have to admit it is getting harder to just plain be happy for them, which I honestly am, and not feel a deep pain of real envy! I was thinking I was jealous, but looked up the word jealousy,and found out it refers to relationships. Envy is all about wanting what someone else has. They have their kids...and I REALLY WANT MINE!!!Maybe it's just PMS,but I am so green! God please give me grace!

Thursday, November 09, 2006

It made me laugh...and has nothing to do with adoption.

funny commercial

I just got a tip from Denise, Abby Jade's Mom about this new Christmas CD by the group Third Day. There is a song about a Chinese orphan called Merry Christmas. I just ordered the CD and I bet it will be my new favorite! Thanks Denise! My tip, You can download the song at walmarts site for only 88 cents. By the way, Abby Jade is probably Sarah's best friend! Denise and I might (I am dreaming out loud here)take the girls to the National gallery in London and introduce them to Michelangelo and Picasso! Abby's new daddy comes from England! Did you know that most of the galleries and museums in London are free? London will cost you an arm and a leg, but the art and history are free!

"Merry Christmas"

There's a little girl trembling on a cold December morn
Crying for mama's arms
At an orphanage just outside a little China town
Where the forgotten are

But half a world away I hang the stockings by the fire
And dream about the day when I can finally call you mine

It's Christmas time again but you're not home
Your family is here and yet you're somewhere else alone
So tonight I pray that God will come and hold you in His arms
And tell you from my heart
I wish you Merry Christmas

As I hang the tinsel on the tree and watch the twinkling lights
I'm warmed by the fire's glow
Outside the children tumble in a wonderland of white
And make angels in the snow

But half a world away you try your best to fight the tears
And hope that Heaven's Angels come to carry you here

Christmas is the time we celebrate the Holy Child
And we celebrate His perfect gift of love
He came to Earth to give His life and prepare a place for us
So we could have a home with Him above

It's Christmas time again and now you're home
Your family is here so you will never be alone
So tonight before you go to sleep,
I'll hold you in my arms
And tell you from my heart
I wish you Merry Christmas

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

"Our children will someday take their wings to embrace a new and happy life, just as the butterflies."
This was said by a women working in an orphanage in China. I thought it was a good word for my butterfly Sarah.