This blog covers our wait, travel, and adjustment to our 4 year old adopted Chinese daughter Sarah Shui Qing from Nanjing. There are over 1000 posts. I have moved my blog to Catching Butterflies 2. I hope you will enjoy reading this blog. It has alot of information on Special needs adoption. Follow us to our new address Catching Butterflies 2! Thank you for reading!

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Today was very emotional, and I'm very very tired. I took Nicole and Jessica for a long taxi ride around Shanghai. It is a very cool city, especially at night! I made the mistake of blowing up at Juergen (in front of Sarah). After all I have been through today, Sarah was following Juergen around like a puppy holding on to his hand, and he let her! The point (and it was messy because I'm an emotional mess) was you should not allow her to do this! If she has to attach herself to someone, let it be my Mom. She is going to Guangzhou and Juergen isn't! Juergen and I took a long drive in a taxi, and let my Mom put Sarah to bed. She only cried 30 seconds when he left, and she went to bed great for Grandma. The reality is it's not Juergen or Mom that she has the problem with, it's me! I am trying to take over the role of her Mom, and she doesn't have room in her heart for a new Mom. She loved her nanny; she doesn't want to accept a new mom! In the church I grew up in, if a pastor dies, or leaves the denomination sends in a transitional pastor. This person takes the grief and loss of the church. If people want to compare him to the old guy, it doesn't matter...he is just transitional! Juergen and I think Sarah doesn't want parents just yet! She just wants a transitional care taker! We are going to let Mom be this person. In the mean time, I'm going to stop being emotional around Sarah. I'm going to try to calmly wait until she is ready to invite me in. I think I have allot more peace because my Mom is going to be Switzerland, and all warring parties can call an end to the present conflict! I hope we can just relax and enjoy tomorrow! We need a good day!